At the airport in Cochin, a little bored

I am sitting at internet kiosk in Cochin, waiting for my flight to Chennai.

I've been on a houseboat trip through the "Backwaters" of (the tropical state of) Kerala.

*** They just made me switch computers ***

The "Backwaters" are aptly named. It is a rather large waterway that extends from Cochin to about 140 km south. Along its banks, the banks of the hundreds of canals that compose it, are village after village, some of which are on strips of land no more than 20 ft wide. The surrounding vegetation is very tropical - coconut, pineapple, and mango trees - and is itself surrounded by rice patties (sp?). The people are very friendly and often waved at the strange person floating by.

Last night, before dinner, I took the opportunity to hire canoe (accompanied by a pilot). It was basically a hollowed out tree. We canoed through some of the side canals that are inaccessible to the houseboat. From the canoe, I was able to more closely observe the villages. In fact, I actually witnessed a fight between two villagers; two men, they were yelling at each other from about 30 ft away. It was somewhat surreal because they each had a cow and the cows were moo-ing at each other as well. Obviously, I could not understand the dispute of the men any more than the dispute of the cows; it looked heated though.

On the canoe trip, every 5 minutes or so, the pilot would decide to suggestively sell something. It would go something like this:

Pilot: "Saaaa....Saaaaaaaa"
Me: "Yes?"
My Imaginary Colonial Counterpart: "Yes pilot, what is it?"
Pilot: "Maaiinngooo? Bear-eeee goooood.....Taain rupees"
Me: "No, thank you...they don't look ripe"
My Imaginary Colonial Counterpart: "Pilot, drive on. I shall not have one of those mangos. They don't look fit for beasts at the moment."
***5 minutes ***
Pilot: "Saaaa....Saaaaaaaa"
Me: "Yes?"
My Imaginary Colonial Counterpart: "What is it now, Pilot? Are your skinny arms tired or something?"
Pilot: "Coocoonuuut? Coocoonuuut...Taain rupees"
Me: "No. That's ok. I'm not sure what I would do with it at the moment."
My Imaginary Colonial Counterpart: "Surely you must be joking. First, I will not allow this canoe to be stopped in order for you to scale that tree, retrieve one of its coconuts, and break your neck on the way down; surely you don't expect me to rush to your aid, do you? Second, when I want a coconut, I will simply order one of those children on the bank to fetch one; and they will happily take 3 rupees in exchange. Trouble me no more please."
*** 5 minutes ***
Pilot: "Saaaa....Saaaaaaaa"
Me: "Ummmhmmmm"
My Imaginary Colonial Counterpart: "Good god man, do you not understand English? I was enjoying a wonderful rendition of God, Save the Queen in my head and you've ruined it."
Pilot: "Maaaiinngoooo?" *** you get the picture ***

After a while, without asking me, he stopped the boat and bashed a mango out of a nearby tree. He smashed it open with his oar. It wasn't even a little orange so I didn't really want to try it. I did anyway, at his prodding. As expected, it was the most sour thing that I have ever tasted. He stopped asking afterwards.

I am going to read a little before my flight....signing off!